7 Signs Treat Your Wife as a Friend

Your wife is supposed to be your friend and a friend is treated as equals.

The article is for anyone married to a woman or for people to pursue that special someone.

You need to give her respect and love in every endeavor of your life. A woman is the most caring and adorable person in one’s life.

The best way to make new friends is by being cordial, to the ones you already have__My wife

In a patriarchal society, women are hardly ever afforded the respect and care they deserve. The institution of marriage has been relegated to the status of mere lineage carrier, and therefore, women suffer the ramifications of an unnatural institution. Society has to change its mindset toward women, and it starts with you and me.

I recently celebrated my first anniversary, which incidentally coincided with the pandemic. I am a voracious reader and have read numerous books on caricatures describing a woman’s social status throughout ancient and modern periods.

Due to evolutionary reasons, women evolved to have a superior emotional quotient and were more suited to tolerate physical exertion. While it is true that the Men of today have nothing to do with ancient social evils such as Sati Pratha, etc., the responsibility to curb our attitude and condescending behavior towards women surely falls in our lap.

Women are considered goddesses in India, but women’s general attitude and treatment do not reflect our philosophy.

I have observed households where both spouses work and have concluded that they are also expected to complete their household chores after tending to their professional duties. The husbands usually do not participate in such chores. The problem is not that men are inherently evil or condescending.

Rather, they are part of a society that has instilled certain norms and attributed specific duties to men and women. The need of the hour is a complete overhaul of our societal setup and an attitudinal change in men wherein men would treat their wives as partners and not as indentured servants. Treat your wife the way you treat your friends.

So here are 7 ways to treat your wife as a friend:

1. Be the servant at your home: Try to be more engaged in household chores. I understand that we have been programmed to expect women to do menial household work, given that since childhood, it was our mother who tended to such obligations. With changing times and more emphasis on women’s empowerment and equality, an attitudinal change is long overdue.
2. Please don’t ask her for any personal favors: Avoid treating your wife as a personal secretary. Wash your clothes, manage your office files on your own, and make your coffee. My wife has always insisted on washing my belongings, but I have made sure that such an opportunity never arises.
3. Respect begets Respect: Respect is not imparted automatically but, rather, it is earned. Earn your respect and treat everyone with respect.
4. Please do not blame her for any honest mistakes: Nobody is perfect; mistakes happen, deal with them.
5. Be honest and transparent with her: The key to any successful relationship is honesty. Honesty increases the fidelity of both partners and creates a strong foundation for a marriage.
6. Take her advice: We all have heard the age-old adage, “Behind every successful man, there is a woman.” A woman’s perspective on life, business, or relationship presents a unique vantage point and helps you gain a deeper understanding of these facets. Be it budgeting, construction of your home, and, most importantly, bearing a child, should be done with the aid and advice of your wife.
7. Take responsibility for grooming and developing your first child: Having a baby is a life-changing and immensely joyous occasion, but it comes with its fair share of responsibilities.

“Where there is a woman there is magic” __Ntozake Shange

While I was writing this article, I found some interesting facts from global celebrities:

You are still my best, “Michel Obama effused to Barack Obama in an Instagram post celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary.

Justin Timberlake said on an award show: You can’t have innovation without creation, So finally I want to thank my best friend, my favorite collaborator, my wife, Jessica.”

Peter Pearson and Ellyn Bader are founders of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, Calif, and the authors of “Tell Me, No Lies.”

A good marriage, she said, is when people “Push each other, Challenge each other, encourage each other and, yes change each other”

“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” __John Lennon

For a society to flourish, women need to be at the forefront. While laws ensure that men and women are on equal footing, governments and civil society must synergistically implement these laws and mold a society that respects and empowers women.

I will leave you with an old African proverb to ponder upon-

If you educate a man, you educate an individual, but if you educate a woman, you educate a nation.

I hope you have learned something new and sincerely believe you would implement the suggestions made in your daily life. The article was originally published on Medium.Thank You for Reading!